biko held my hand last night

i know, i know, i haven't posted in forever. at first i was waiting until i got my camera back so that i could post pictures of israel palestine, and then stuff happened so i thought i would just do one big post... but now i'm at jody's house without pictures or a good story to tell.

i'm trying to figure out what the fuck i'm doing in this town. aside from working at the mug, which i adore. but it used to be a life broken up into living in a fantastic house, working a fantastic job, and going to school, which i loved. now we're down to a fantastic job, a house i still love but more for the memories, and lots of days spent staring off into space.

now, if i had decided not to go to grad school, i would already have a job/place to live in LA, and be working on getting a teaching credential, and possibly join the friends who are currently writing curriculum for cleveland. cest la vie.... i guess.

and it doesn't help that i live in the MOST TRANSIENT TOWN IN THE UNIVERSE (or at least california, which is kinda the same thing). because i feel like i don't really have any friends left. and the ones i do have left are either in long term monoga relationships WITH EACH OTHER or work like, sixty thousand hours a week.

and i fucking hate havng a pity party for myself, but i'm lonely.

dammit!

grad school better be fucking worth it.

in other news, i want another tattoo.